Showing posts from October, 2014

Life's scars

Life leaves scars.  Sometimes they are big visible ones like the one left behind by my caesareans.  Sometimes they are big but leave an internal scar.  The scar of a miscarriage or a still-birth.  The loss of a close relative.  Those scars that over time you kind of get used to carrying around quietly in your heart.  The initial impact might gradually fade, but they're still there.  Part of who you are.  A remnant of your life story.

This year has been a year that's left a scar on me.  I've experienced anxiety in ways that I've never felt before.  It's changed me.  I'm still processing how that kind of anxiety and stress has impacted on me.  I've appreciated paid employment in a way that's been new to me.  I understand now why people who are facing crises in their personal life will keep persevering with making it to work, because it provides structure and predictability and task completion.

But like a caesarean scar reminds me of the happy arrival o…