Friday, March 2, 2012

Now that I'm in the working mum camp ...


Last week a work colleague of my husband's said that lots of people had been asking her if she knew how I was going.  So, I'd better tell you how my transition from the SAHM camp to the working mum camp is getting on.  Seems there is some interest in it.

Obviously from my lack of writing on my blog, I'm feeling pretty swamped.  I'm not unhappy, our family isn't unhappy, my marriage isn't unhappy.  I just feel tired.  And slightly panicky a lot of the time.

The slightly panicky feeling comes from a variety of sources.  Making I sure I get ready to get to work in time.  Dealing with the mysteries of a new job.  Making sure I've signed all the appropriate notes for the kids (I spent 90 minutes last week solidly signing notes and writing cheques for the kids).  Helping the kids who need help with music practice.  Paying all the bills.  Making sure homework is ticking along.  Buying stationery, sports equipment, sheet music, clarinet reeds, swimmers, cardboard, birthday presents. Baking stuff for school lunch boxes.  Getting rid of nits.  All the normal stuff, but all in a much shorter period of time (and often late at night - it is amazing what Kmart sells).

And really I'm getting off scott free at home.  Rowan has been doing stacks of cooking and shopping.  He's been doing the bulk of the running around of the children.  The man is a legend (and very patient with the craziness I bring to our lives).

Earlier this week I was a little upset by the all the 'How are you?' comments.  I was wondering if people were asking to see how long it will be before I fall apart.  I thought that maybe others didn't think I could actually pull it off (btw, are you picking up that I might be a bit tired and thus, just a teensy bit over-sensitive??).

But in chatting to friends, they've said that it's because people are genuinely interested (fancy that??), are caring about me (who'd thunk?) and they miss hearing what I'm up to (more fancy that!).

I suspect there's a bit of curiosity as well.  Lots of women are genuinely interested to know how others do life because it might help them juggle their lives better.  Or how it looks in practice, to do the working/kids thing.

I expect that I will explore this issue more in the months ahead.  I certainly get the sense that what I'm doing isn't quite the proper behaviour for a mother of five (and a Christian one at that).  And today I employed a cleaner, which is probably an indicator of the start of my descent down the slippery slope of the dodgy working mother (but people, you really need to see my bathroom, the time has come).

Btw, that Proverbs 31 woman has a lot to answer for - how exactly did she do all that??

7 comments:

simone r said...

The proverbs 31 woman had more than one cleaner!

Deb L said...

I'm with Simone. She had "servant girls" plural. And so it's fine to go about and consider vineyards and buy and sell in the market place and, yes, even to have others do your household chores so you can concentrate on the above. To the benefit of your family, the praise of your husband and of course the glory of God.

lucy said...

Jenny I was wondering how you were going! I was one of them.. All the way over here in blighty. Main reason ( and entirely selfishly) was a mild anxiety that now that you have joined the ranks of working mum, you might give up your blog! It has been a source of great personal concern Jenny. However.. I see it has not happened.. So, by all means keep the day job, but please keep the blog too!

Karen said...

Some random thoughts after reading your post...

I want a cleaner....isn't it great that the Proverbs 31 woman sets us such a good example in this!?

I have missed your blog posts :) but completely get the craziness of trying to squeeze stuff into one non-working day a week.

With you on the "sense that what I'm doing isn't quite the proper behaviour for a mother of five (and a Christian one at that..." I feel this quite often.
And agree that you can't do this without the help of a legendary husband. Mine can cook, clean and look after kids with the best of them :)

So glad to hear you're surviving though. It's a big transition you're making. Look forward to hearing more of your thoughts about it as time goes on...

Gina said...

Proverbs 31 woman lived in a pre-Industrial Revolution household where work life WAS home life. Home was work, work was home, there wasn't some sense of choice in the matter, it's just that she did what was on her plate with commitment! Sounds like you are too. Plus I think that chapter is more of a metaphor on Wisdom anyway :-)

I think you're right that people are curious, I certainly am. Maybe you can redefine 'proper behaviour' for us? Or obliterate the idea altogether...

Kath said...

Oh, that vexed concept, the 'proper' mother.
I'm thinking of you and praying for you as you settle into things :)

Sandra said...

So what is a proper mother?